Hey Folks,
So I'm surprised this topic hasn't been posted on here, so I decided on my way in to work this morning that I would start it.
So, I have to preface this with a couple of things;
1. I got engaged on Friday (and this was a moment I thought I would never see due to my anxiety and panic disorder.)
2. I celebrated a little too much to the point my hangover was real bad on Saturday, and it didn't help that my vertigo kicked in as well.
3. Not so much but thinking about the plane crash near my home was enough to "hurt" a little.
So, I'm dehydrated, I'm having side effects from my vertigo (headed to the doctor's today to see what they can do for it), I must've ate something tha tdidn't sit well with my stomach so I'm going to the bathroom alot this morning, and now I'm back at work.
My anxiety as a whole is okay, but the irrational thoughts are lingering. And yes, they're about hurting others. I have to admit that it has been worse, so I'm feeling okay with it. The experts say to just ignore the thoughts or let them be, which is what I'm doing. Pretty tough but I can recall a time when the thoughts felt so "real" that you couldn't imagine anything else.
Perseverence, acceptance, and coping techniques is all I need right now. Also, writing to you all about this is making it easier as well. If you can't share your thoughts on this forum, write them down in a journal. Don't keep them bent up inside of you becasue it'll only cause you more anxiety. Trust me, I couldn't wait to get to work to let you all know what I was feeling. It has taken me a while to be upfront and honest with everyone, but this feels real good. I can already tell I'm feeling alot better.
To those who are dealing with this right now, just remember that they are only toughts, and not reality. I suggest you listen to Paul's podcast on this subject because it does help. He's been through it, and he came out from the dark side of his battle. I've done it as well, and this is just a reminder that I still have work to do. So be it, I knew thsi wasn't going to be overnight, so I need to work on it and move on.
Peace and Calm,
Arturo
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