Hello guys,

I am very pleased that I have found Anxiety Guru, the place I can share stories about anxiety with people. This is so meaningful to me since my anxiety primarily consists of self-doubt and self-defeating thoughts in social situations. When I am at work, for example, my mind starts racing with thoughts such as "I'm not good enough" or "People hate me because of my awkwardness and incompetency". My body responds to these thoughts with palpitations, tense muscles and a queasy stomach. I am now working in a school setting and struggling to work with others and fulfill my job responsibilities. When I come home, my mind replays some scenes to point out my failures of the day as well as my colleagues' frustrated faces.

The fact that I moved to the U.S. six years ago does not help the situation, but I also know that the anxiety is not simply triggered by cultural/language barrier. I am not as social as I used to be back in my country, but here in the U.S., I am still able to enjoy connecting with people in a few social occasions except at work. While I still find my desire to socialize, my anxiety is pushing me to the level where I feel that "the social me" has never existed. I used to be able to separate myself at work and in private times, but the boundary is getting very subtle. The funny thing is that I have had this kind of anxiety especially at work throughout my life. But, I always had some places and occasions to be myself. I would assume the lack of social opportunities and not having close friends or family in distant locations are also the contributing factors of my anxiety.

Visiting here and opening up myself to you guys, however, is helpful. And yet, this is an ongoing process. I will try to come by often.

Thank you,
Choco

Paul,

Thank you for your reply and encouraging words. I have been thinking about how to tackle my problem as well as simplifying steps/solutions to reach my ultimate goal. Now I am reading your book and listening to your podcast as well as practicing meditation, which I find helpful. I will continue my journey no matter what.